Silmarilli and Plagiarists

It came to pass in the late days of July that I went to the library; and all was boring and drab to my eyes. And behold, I saw a copy of the Silmarillion on a shelf; and the sight of it was as balm to my eyes and soothing to my mind; and I said to Gene, 'Behold; for ages have I sought a free copy of this, and now one has fallen into my possession; therefore rejoice!'
But Gene had not the mind of a fan of Tolkien, and his countenance was puzzled; so he asked and enquired into the contents of the book: whereupon I lent unto him the book for a span of a minute, a minute and a half, and in this time he read the synopsis upon the back. And he gave forth utterance to the question in his mind, and with great thought and deliberation he said, 'Is this book of the Lord of the Rings?'
And I took the book from him, lest his hands should sully the covers; and I began to read it. And when it came time to leave the library and proceed unto our class, I checked the book out of the library; for its storyline had become deeply engrossing and my mind was fixed upon it.
And I read the book slowly, for art is meant to be savoured bit by bit; as the gourmet buffet is ruined through gluttonous stuffing of one's face, so the good book is spoiled by the excessive usage of speed reading. But I said unto Pooh, 'I am reading it slowly.'
And she laughed and said, 'I am glad! for it means that you have lost your skills of speed reading; and I now have the advantage of you.'
But I read on; and finally, as even the great mountain is hewn down by repeated scoops with a spoon, so the book was eventually finished; although I was overwhelmed in the midst of the book by a deluge of names and places. Thus I finished the book.
And I said to myself, 'I have enjoyed the reading of this; for the style is good. Therefore I shall create a post like unto this book in attempt, though not as good in standard or beauty. Yet so that my mastery of the English language may be proven unto all readers, I shall create a post in this manner.'
So time went by, and behold I went once again to the library; for it is my habit to frequent the library in search of myths and fables; and I found a book, Eragon, which I found not at all to my liking; for in storyline and plot it was like unto the Wheel of Time.
For the plot was in all points of importance identical to the WoT; and in many places there were similar sentences. And I found it wearying, and my hands itched to put it down; for it was tiresome unto me. And so it now reposes within the confines of my bag, whence it shall presently be taken out and read; for it is my nature such that I hate to leave any book half-read, with exception towards text-books.
It pleased my editor today (for I have made myself one part of the school editorial) to appoint me the task of interviewing; because I had made myself a busybody in her eyes, and able to root out the innermost secrets of a fellow being. Therefore she set me a task, and said that I had to interview him before half a fortnight has passed; and thus I am in a quandary.
For my mind is slow and stubborn, and my mouth quick to offend; and it was laid out in my instructions that I should be interesting and witty in form and conversation. And so I have turned to the light of my life and the hope of my edition; and I ask you, reader, to furnish me forthwith with interesting queries and questions to ask the man. For my delight is in perfection of all that I do in English, and interviews are therefore included; so my plea is this: that you give me questions to ask him; and grant me this boon: that you may give me interesting questions and not only run-of-the-mill ones, for I have already a slew of those.

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